Next time you walk past a construction site in its beginning stages, check out the foundations… see how deep they go down, in order to build a tall structure. This isn’t all that different from us building our own lives. Let’s explore that idea!
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Welcome to A Musing, I’m Diego.
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Today’s episode… Dig.
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Have you ever walked past a construction site in its early stages during the time that the foundations are being built?
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You know, sometimes it’s easy to think of buildings as these massive structures kind of sitting on the ground.
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But there’s much more going on underneath that most people simply aren’t privy to unless they witness the building of the foundations.
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These foundation holes are massive and deep, especially when it’s a building that’s going to rise over 20 stories.
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That massive hole is dug essentially cutting a cube into the ground.
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Then even deeper columns are dug into the ground inside that cube.
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Casings are then forced into these deep vertical holes and concrete is poured into them, filling them until the concrete settles into completely solid vertical columns deep into the ground.
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And these columns can reach all the way down into the bedrock layer.
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So basically, the weight of the entire building is distributed and rests, not on the layers of soil and clay inside the ground, but on the firm foundation of the bedrock.
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This allows buildings to sustain through earthquakes and strong winds.
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It also makes it so that the building’s levels and stability don’t depend on surfaces that can shift, but rather on a solid foundation that will keep the structure in place.
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And the higher up the building needs to reach, the deeper the foundations need to go.
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That idea, that to go taller, you need to go deeper, it reminds me in part of the human journey.
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Your journey.
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Many people obsess over self-help and personal improvement, and there are plenty of motivators and life coaches out there that can be incredibly uplifting.
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But a message that’s not spoken about very often is the need that you might have to look back before you look forward, or to stick with our example, to look down before you look up.
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Because personal growth should be much deeper than just appearing like you’re progressing.
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And there’s so much of that going around, so many cases of people showing off their highlight reel on social media, and their followers consciously or subconsciously comparing their own gag reel to their greatest hits on Instagram.
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You get caught in that trap, and it’s very easy to lose heart and to start questioning the state of your own life.
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But don’t let yourself be fooled by the flashiness of the building, because the real measure of growth and progress is not cosmetic.
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It’s not superficial.
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Real growth should be sustainable for the long term.
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And believe me, Instagrammable moments are fleeting, but if your growth is based on a firm, deep foundation, that is long lasting.
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So, dig.
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Dig for all the things that weaken your foundation, your life.
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Pay attention to the things people do, the things people say, or the circumstances in life that trigger you into losing control.
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That loss of control could be fits of anger, rage, depression, anxiety.
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It could be binging meant to escape certain feelings or thoughts.
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Most people walk around completely oblivious to their own triggers.
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They simply bounce from conflict to conflict like a ball in a pinball machine, feeling like victims of that person or that circumstance or that employer, but never stopping to dig and find out why it is that that thing makes them lose it.
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Become aware of what baggage you’ve been carrying around, possibly your entire life, that slows down your personal growth and progress.
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Look at the wounds you carry, your hurt, your pain, betrayals, failures.
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Understand that hatred and resentment are poisonous to the heart and mind, your heart and mind.
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Because your hatred and resentment towards that individual isn’t causing them pain.
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It’s you who is being poisoned by them, and this is poison you’re likely to spread around to your friends, family, to your kids who are watching and absorbing who you are, whether you want to or not.
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You’re doing this for yourself.
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This is not about them.
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Let life take care of their debt.
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The earthquakes and winds, they come for all of us.
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The question is, how will the life you’re building stand against them?
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Start the healing process as soon as you can.
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Depending on the amount of baggage and the intensity of what you’ve got to face within yourself, this might not be a process you want to start on your own.
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You might need a guide or a confidant to help you through it, perhaps a minister or counselor or a psychologist.
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There are also options nowadays that weren’t available just a couple of years back, so take advantage of things like telehealth tools to do it from the comfort of your own home.
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But, don’t put it off.
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Start digging and preparing your foundation as soon as possible.
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And once you’ve started digging, don’t dwell.
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No great structure got built by lingering at the foundation stage.
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Acknowledge what you must.
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Ask for forgiveness where you must.
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Forgive what you must.
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Heal, make resolutions to let go of the herd and the baggage, and then build.
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If you put the time into setting solid foundations based on forgiveness, self-awareness, and letting go of what kept you down, don’t return to the foundations.
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Focus on the growth.
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That’s the exciting part.
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The thought that you can walk free in life knowing you’re not chained down to anything or anyone through resentment or wounds from your past, and that you won’t be broken by life’s ups and downs.
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The thought that that particular thing someone says or does isn’t going to trigger the hurt and pain.
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The fact that you won’t be charging someone in your present life for the hurt someone caused in your past.
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It’s freedom to build, freedom to grow.
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The higher up your life needs to reach, the deeper your foundations need to go.
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Most people will never even be aware of what’s going on inside you, beneath the surface, but they will marvel at the beauty of the life that shoots out from within you.
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Let me know how it goes.
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You can write me at contactamusing.gmail.com.
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Subscribe or follow so you don’t miss the next episode, and please remember to share this message with someone who needs to hear it.
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I will catch you in the next episode.